Chris L'Esperance
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist #114845
Covid-19 Services:
Now offering online therapy services for
Santa Cruz and San Luis Obispo County Residents.
PTSD and Trauma
Am I experiencing Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder?
People who experience Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder may experience a variety of symptoms related to their trauma including anxiety, depression, panic attacks, flashbacks, dissociation, trouble sleeping, changes in eating habits, nightmares and hyper-vigilance.
There are usually two main types of trauma experiences that lead to PTSD, shock trauma and repeated or prolonged exposure to trauma. Shock trauma is one major traumatic event like a car accident. Examples of repeated or prolonged exposure to trauma are soldiers at war and victims of domestic violence where the trauma may play out over a long period of time. PTSD can be very hard on the individual and their loved ones. The good news is that post-traumatic stress disorder is treatable and can be overcome with therapeutic work and support.
What can I do about my PTSD symptoms?
People who struggle with post-traumatic stress disorder may feel like their lives are consumed by their symptoms and triggers. They may find themselves avoiding certain activities or feeling like there are things in life that they simply cannot do because of their symptoms.
Through the therapy process, we will work together to identify your specific symptoms and triggers, then find strategies that will help you to better manage them. People who struggle with symptoms related to trauma also tend to have difficulty with self-regulation. Learning to regulate one’s own emotions and nervous system is very important in the process of healing from trauma. There are a variety of different strategies and skills that people find useful for regulating their own nervous systems. Meditation or some other form of breath work is a common and popular tool for regulating a person’s nervous system. Exercise is another common strategy. It doesn’t even have to be intense exercise, it could be going on a walk, some light yoga, or a leisurely bike ride. Spending time in nature is another strategy that many people find helpful. This could even mean spending more time in the garden, or keeping some plants in your apartment. For some people, doing something creative helps them ground and regulate themselves. Playing an instrument, doodling, using an adult coloring book, cooking, listening to music, are a few more strategies that people find useful. Writing in a journal or talking to a friend just to vent or organize their thoughts and feelings is another way people might get back to a more regulated state.
What is developmental trauma?
Developmental trauma refers to trauma that occurs in childhood during important developmental stages of life. When people experience developmental trauma, the effects can have a deep impact on how they view themselves, their relationships, and the world around them. Part of the reason that this occurs is that we develop defense or coping strategies in order to manage our current circumstances as children. These strategies are usually self-protective in nature and help us to survive the trauma mentally, emotionally and even physically. Often these strategies are effective initially, however, later in life they may become problematic and interfere with our adult lives and relationships. In working with developmental trauma, I help clients to identify areas in their lives that may be adversely effected by their trauma experiences. We then collaborate to develop new strategies and skills that are better suited for the life or relationships that you want. We will also work through the trauma from your past so that you are able to liberate yourself from those wounds and move forward in your life.
What if I’ve experienced sexual trauma?
If you have endured sexual trauma you may experience similar symptoms as those with PTSD and/or developmental trauma. You may also have particular difficulty in romantic or sexual relationships. The nature of sexual trauma can often be confusing and disorienting making it difficult for you to trust others. You may also feel responsible and/or guilty for what happened.
Similar to working with other forms of trauma, addressing sexual trauma includes a focus on safety, security and comfort. Due to the nature of sexual trauma, we will need to re-establish healthy and appropriate boundaries through the therapeutic process. It is important for you to feel that your relational and sexual boundaries are heard and respected by those with whom you have a relationship. Similarly, we will work to strengthen your sense of control so that you can then feel safe and empowered in your relationships, especially sexual relationships. It is possible for you to have healthy romantic and sexual relationships with healthy and appropriate boundaries.
Will I need to re-live my trauma to get better?
The short answer is no. Healing from trauma starts with establishing a sense of safety, security and comfort. We will then identify and build on your resources that help you feel safe outside of the therapy room. Once we are able to build up a solid sense of safety and security we will carefully address and process feelings related to your trauma. These often include feelings of sadness, anger and fear but may also include a wide range of other emotions. These emotions are associated with trauma but do not require you to re-experience your trauma. It is critical that we do this at a pace that is right for you.
What does the process of working through my trauma look like?
Those who have experienced trauma often feel anxious, unsafe, or uncomfortable in situations that seem safe and non-threatening. This experience can be very confusing and leads many people to feel that there is something wrong with them. Many people also experience hyper-vigilance, which is when someone is highly alert and looking for possible dangers or threats in their environment. People with trauma can feel like a certain social context or a new romantic relationship should be safe, but they may find that they actually feel tense and anxious. This is why creating a sense of safety, stability and comfort is essential for recovering from trauma. As simple as this may sound, it can be difficult to accomplish.
Through the therapeutic relationship you will learn what triggers your trauma. We will also work together to find what helps you feel safe. We will identify both internal and external resources for safety and stability. Internal resources include exercise, meditation, journaling, and a number of other strategies. External resources consist of the help you receive from friends, family members, and others who are part of your support system. These may be people you can call or spend time with when you feel anxious, they can give you reassurance when you feel uncertain, and can remind you of that strategies that help you to manage symptoms and heal from your trauma.
Supporting you on your journey to recovering from trauma:
I find working with people who are wanting to overcome their trauma to be incredibly rewarding. Sometimes clients come in to therapy who can’t imagine life without the symptoms of trauma they endure. They feel like their trauma is part of who they are and how they see themselves in the world. I do not believe that people who have experienced trauma are broken, weak or unable to return to the life that they want. Working through trauma does take patience, persistence and effort. I enjoy seeing people thrive in their lives and feel liberated from the symptoms and limitations of their trauma.